Strangers Live Here Now
I own things in my heart that I don’t actually own. Yes, that is as weird as it sounds.
I grew up on a lake in Montana. It wasn’t a private lake. It was shared with all sorts of people with cabins who lived there during the weekends on the summer, but only a few families lived there year round. This is one of the reasons why I claimed the lake as mine. I was there month after month. I was there when the lake was too cold to use. I was there during the intense storms, all the bad moments. I was there saving neighbors’ docks that were pulled free from southerly storms. Continue reading →
1 CommentThose Moments of Clarity are Frightening
I wrote this almost a month ago but couldn’t bring myself to post it. In the midst of my Self Improvement through Attitude Adjustment month, I read this again and felt it does have a place.
I had one of those moments. We know these moments. We usually enjoy these moments. They get great names like Eureka! moments, epiphanies, or Dawning Realization. Sometimes the moments are so tremendous that we give them titles like “Paradigm Shift” or say of them “Everything has Changed”. Continue reading →
Comments OffLearning the Deeper Motivations of Others
I joined Audible the other day.
This in and of itself is a pretty trivial bit of information for me to share. Trust me when I say I have a reason and that reason does relate to my month of self-improvement through attitude adjustment. One of the first books I bought I purchased for marketing purposes and admittedly for a selfish ‘maybe this will help’ purposes. I’m far too embarrassed to mention the title but suffice it to say, the book is one of those self-help books that is supposed to assist and guide someone like me in interacting with others. Continue reading →
Comments OffLove and Career
My quest for a more contented life boils down to two key elements: love and career.
I don’t think I’m unique in this way. People want to be in love, have love an active ongoing part of their life, and they want a life with meaningful challenges that rewards them with a sense of satisfaction and enough wealth to afford a comfortable lifestyle.
Last night I got into a conversation with a woman I used to date. It was via text messages which always makes for a stilted conversation. Not my favorite way to have a discussion but still a viable method for discourse. I can’t say what her motivation for contacting me was but she had brought up my self-improvement month. We had a nice back-and-forth about my efforts and her efforts to make improvements in ourselves.
I made the statement to her, “You are finding your way. It will all come together eventually.” She responded with “You will too.” Continue reading →
Comments OffAttitude Adjustment Through Metaphorical Altitude Adjustment
Attitude adjustment has proven to be a difficult process for me. I can fall into patterns of self-abuse so easily, it is rote for me. Once again, I curse the lack of variety in the tools I can use to accomplish this goal. I am committed to the process, though, so there is no turning back.
Once I started this process I started thinking back on all the ‘tools’ I use for interpersonal communication and conflict resolution. Conflict resolution came to mind because what is happening is I am essentially in conflict with myself. I’m the boss of myself and I’m disappointed in my employee’s behavior and I’m getting a bit belligerent about it.
When I’m actually in conflict with someone else or am advising someone regarding a conflict they are having, I use the phrase ‘Rise above it.’ In my point of view, we get two options regarding conflict, we can get down in the mud and fight it out or we can rise above it and move on. Yet, whenever I get in conflict with myself, I can’t help but fall right in the mud and wrestle with myself.
Continue reading →
Lead People in Their Perception of You
A benefit and curse of being ‘a nice guy’ is I have a lot of women friends and they confide a lot of information to me, including their insecurities. I often make the statement, “Men are stupid, they don’t know if a woman is hot until she tells him she is.”
Of course this is a hyper-simple statement, meant to bolster ego than anything, but there is a gem of truth in it and it doesn’t apply to just men. In terms of how other people treat us, a lot of it is based on how we treat ourselves. Our words and actions in how they relate to ourselves is a giant, huge, massive road sign for how others treat us. Continue reading →
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