I accepted a blogging challenge called #Trust30 in honor of the republishing of Ralph Waldo Emerson’s book Self-Reliance. Essentially over the next 30 days I will be given snippets of thoughts from which I must create something. In my case that something will be written works. I find this particularly interesting since I was musing a few weeks ago about wanting to start a Lyceum. Anyway, here is the Day 1 challenge presented without apology.
Do you know what truly sucks? Knowing. Knowing all of this is going to come to an end. Knowing that our consciousness, our existence is the faintest of light in a sea of stars and just like a distant star could be snuffed out without anyone noticing, so can we.
It is hard not to be a nihilist, to think that any of this, this world, this life, matters is difficult.
Here I am, fifteen minutes away from the inevitable conclusion of all of our pathetic lives and you’ve gathered around me like the friends of Socrates waiting for me to quaff my potion to hold up me end of the social contract with a small minded, bigoted state. Oh yes, I hear the murmurs that I should resist, that I should flee, that I should embrace hypocrisy and cast aside all my previously held beliefs in order to live yet another day. Those people are like the priests asking me to beg Jesus for forgiveness, to be forgiven of a sin of knowledge. How dare I be born of a species that has as part of its essential behavior a desire to know and explore. If the Creator of all damns me for the very essence of who I am, then the Creator shall be damned as well. I am but the clay on the potter’s well and all my imperfections were imbued upon me in the act of creation.
You stand back aghast, I know, but this is the sideshow you came to see. Watch me play the role of martyr so you can tell others you were there when, but heaven forbid you take a stand. We humans love fear because it is a wonderful shield to hide behind. We explain why we can’t do something in terms of our fear. Courage is acting in spite of fear, but I’ve never been keen on courage. I prefer boldness, as many of you know. Boldness can come in bursts. Boldness is the swagger, the moment of clarity that allows you to ask the hard question or to simply say ‘no’ when someone has asked too much of you.
Gather around and witness the end as the sands clearly show it draws closer. All of you witnessing this moment will carry forth many different versions of my passing. At least one of you tell this version. I shuffled off this mortal coil by choice, by my own hand, a bold act to show we can live without hypocrisy, that we don’t have to deny our true nature in the end, and no authority on this planet, in this world, God or human, has any control over me that I do not give to them. We can take that power back at anytime we want. No state, no government, no matter how corrupt or brutal rules without the complicit will of the people.
Who does your thinking for you? Question everything. Trust no authority. And ask for the grape kool-aid for your hemlock because the apple juice….