Sean D. Francis

Beware of Simple Happiness Formulae

Posted on 06 September 2010

Far be it from me to criticize others (yeah, right) but I, as a person who struggles with happiness,  was sent a link to this blog post on the happiness process.

Seeing how short the article is, I don’t feel comfortable copying it.  But go, visit it, read it, come back.

So, hey, this seems easy, so let me run through a few scenarios following this process.

Week 1

1. Something that is making me unhappy.  I don’t have a job.

2. Replace ‘I don’t have a job’ with something that makes me happy.  Which means getting an awesome job.  Well, that sounds easy.  I guess I wasn’t trying.

3. Repeat in Week 2

Week 2

1. I’m turning 40, feel like a loser because I lack a career, relationship, close family and close friends.

2. Stop turning 40, get a career, get a relationship, have kids, make close friends.

3. Repeat in Week 3 because obviously these past two weeks are a breeze.

Okay, I’ll stop there.  What I find offensive about this is the belief that unhappiness is just a matter of laziness and not changing the things that are making you unhappy.  I know people who have jobs but hate their jobs.  They don’t dare quit and try something else because they have a mortgage to pay, a family to raise, and don’t have the flexibility of time to take classes to change their fate in life. They are unhappy and need to find a different path to happiness.  When we talk about being happy, I believe we are talking about enabling happiness, allowing ourselves to be happy in those moments when we can be happy.

Am I being overly sensitive?  Happiness isn’t that easy.  And please, understand, I’m not saying that one finds happiness and it is like nirvana – a goal, but find a way to be happy is finding a way to groove with life, to be able to roll with the punches when they come and to celebrate the good times when they come.